When everything was falling apart...

I had a break down in front of my family today.
Root of the break down: French Fries.
As funny as that sounds its truth.
My mom was eating fries.
Asked if any one wanted the rest.
Me and my little sisters said yes.
She gave them to my little sisters.
I got irratated.
Then i tried to tell my mom about a something that happened at school today.My sister inturupted me and started talking to my mom.
I told my sister i was talking.
I got yelled at for inturupting my sister.
Then i got yelled at for getting mad at getting yelled at.
Which led into a snowball of arguments.
Which ended in me yelling about how my sisters are put first.
How my father loves them more then me.
How everything revolves around my little sisters and that i wasnt important.
And then i ran upstairs and started crying.
Which led to me being alone for 10 minutes and feeling like no one cares.
Then my mom called me down stairs.
Told me i was wrong, and thats not true but she understands why i think that.
Now im here...
God i want to cut so badly.
Between that and im starting to have feelings for Gaby again:/
Which scares the hell out of me.
When i see her in the hall way i want to hug her.
I want to kiss her.
I want to hold her hand.
I want to look into those beautiful brown eyes and tell her i love her.
But she doesnt want me.
She stoped wanting me a whoile ago she says.
Fuck My Life.